Why have vampires become the biggiest pussies around, no offense meant to perfectly good vaginas?

A peculiar phenomenon has been occurring in the late 20th and early 21st century. Vampires have become the worst milquetoasts in literature and film. It’s always “Wahhh…I’m vampire” and there’s some girl “Make me one too!” and he goes of and cries about that too. Fuck that! Vampires are badass killers, the predators of man. Even “good vampires are extraordinarily dangerous, as in this example from my novel Christian Blood , prone losing control of the blood lust.

And if you value you life, never, ever piss off a even a “good” vampire:

“I make more money doing this than anything else.” He traced his hand along Isabelle’s thigh, and wandered to the inner part. “Isn’t she beautiful? A woman is never more beautiful then when she sleeps, or when she’s dead.”
Christian was appalled. Fredrick seemed totally transfixed by the dead woman. The cleaner’s hand lingered entirely too long on the woman’s thigh. Christian’s skin crawled. Was this sick weirdo really planning to molest this corpse? He looked toward Heinrich to gauge the older vampire’s reaction. It seemed to be one of restrained disgust, with only a frown giving away his emotions.
The fact that even Heinrich, who killed the woman, even seemed disgusted by Frederick emboldened Christian. “What the fuck are you planning to do with her, you pervert? How dare you rape the dead?”
“It ain’t like she’ll care none…”
Christian grabbed Fredrick by the collar and lifted him off the ground. His voice was a low growl. “I forbid you to do this. Or I’ll kill you.” Christian had never threatened anyone’s life before, but he figured this would a good time to start-especially, if he was condemned to a life of death and killing anyway. If anyone deserved death, it was this violator of the dead.
“Then what? Two dead cleaners in one day? Nobody will work for you again! You’ll fuck yourself over big time, son!”
Christian didn’t care. His disgust of this man was like nothing he had ever felt. Then again, why should he care? He didn’t protest when Heinrich killed her; so why be so offended if the cleaner takes pleasure in her. Was he actually defending the dead or just enforcing an old human taboo? He told himself that she agreed to her death as part of the bargain between her and Heinrich. Her death was consensual. Being raped post-mortum by this degenerate was not…..

Find out what happened today, on Christian Blood: Kindle Edition

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Filed under crime, exoricism, fiction, horror, literature, novel, vampire, vampire novel, writing

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